I have written quite a bit about coffee-related shoes, each time not-so-subtly suggesting that the company give me a pair because of what a big-deal tastemaker I am in the coffee industry. The ploy thus far has been unsuccessful. And I’m done—DONE I TELL YOU—groveling at the trendily shod feet of these brands for a pair of coffee-adjacent footwear. But these avocado toast sneakers, hatchi matchi, Saucony should definitely send me a pair of those.

After what I can only assume was a successful Pumpkin Spice Latte colorway for the Grid SDs—successful enough to not send their old friend Zac a pair at least—Saucony has turned to another ubiquitous cafe offering, avocado toast, for their newest limited edition shoe design. According to Footwear News, the Originals Shadow 6000 “Avocado Toast” is a green and brown take on the brand’s “classic running silhouette.” Per Saucony’s website, the shoe is made of a “toast-ed leather” upper (which some may call babyshit brown, if you use that sort of colorful language), with “smashed avocado textured suede,” and a “red pepper flake speckle collar lining.” The insole features an image of an avocado cut in half, with “Saucamole” written across the heel.

Released on Tuesday earlier this week, February 26th, the Saucony Originals Shadow 6000 “Avocado Toast” is now available via the brand’s website and through select retailers for $130. And at that price, perhaps this is the avocado toast Millennials are buying everyday that is keeping them from buying houses.

I can’t help but wonder, though, if Saucony knows the difference between a smashed avocado and guacamole. Much of the marketing around the new sneaker is very guacamole-forward. Cilantro, lime, fresno peppers, some sort of chipotle or perhaps adobo spice, these are all things that could reasonably go in a nice guac. I’d prefer jalapeños and I have no idea what those scallions are doing there, so maybe they don’t know what guacamole is either. All I’m saying is, you call that “toast-ed” a “cumin leather upper” and you’ve got yourself some nice guacamole shoes.

And don’t get me wrong, Saucony, I want you to send me a pair of these shoes. But if you want my $130, you’re going to have to make a new colorway that’s some combination of coffee, wine, and queso, because that’s what is most likely to get spilled on my sweet kicks.

Zac Cadwalader is the managing editor at Sprudge Media Network and a staff writer based in Dallas. Read more Zac Cadwalader on Sprudge.

Top image via Footwear News

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